Crocodile Boch

Me, Joe, Maria, and Bagatta were swimming in a big muddy lake. We came to discover there was a huge crocodile living in the lake and we started playing dangerous games swimming around it. After a close call between Joe and the croc, we all got out and gathered our things laying on the bank. We couldn't go home because it was kind of the end of the world- we were basically nomads. We started hiking and came upon an abandoned beer distributor that Stevie had taken over. We sat and drank and stocked up on booze before heading on the road...

01.16.2012 Haitian Voodoo

Joe and I are having a big party at our house, and there are a lot of our friends there who don't normally come to our parties. We decide to drive to a bar down the road, but I'm kind of against it the whole time. We went anyway and Poppy was in our car. We all get very wasted and I get really worried about us getting home. Then a really tall pale woman walks in. She is bald and wearing a long, flowing, greyish purple skirt that starts at her nose and goes down to the floor. You can only see her eyes and they are damn creepy. She starts threatening us with weird and enigmatic phrases, and then leaves. I FREAK out and assume she is going to kill Poppy, so I run after her and beat her until she is dead. I discover that she had no body, she was just a head with a spinal cord, floating around. Poppy was fine so I go back into the bar where every body else was. We come out to go home and the "body", rather head, was a melted pile of tissue. Next to the mush was a deck of Magic cards that I assumed were Joe's. He said they weren't, and the top card of the deck was titled "Haitian Voodoo", with a picture of the lady I had killed earlier on it. The description read something like "the only creature that continually reappears throughout the game." I just looked at Joe and said "Aw. Fuck." Thankfully, I woke up right after that.

03.04.2012 Borg Undies

+old dream+
I am a Borg at my parents' house, and I'm mackin' on Data. I very suddenly notice I'm not wearing underpants, so I have to go find them. I check in the chicken coop, because that seems like the logical place for them to be, but the coop was actually an outhouse, and no undies lived there. Then I ended up back in Port Matilda and I had to repaint the inside of our house, which was now twice as big.

07.16.2012 Alien Invasion

+old dream+
Allyson is hosting a picnic at her apartment, which happens to be located two doors down from us (where the Irwin's house is actually). There are lots of people there, including: my parents, the Berlins,  the whole Wegmans crew. There is a great view over Halfmoon Valley from outside the apartment building. The sky gets really dark, so we start cleaning up the picnic. Then these BLACK circular clouds slowly fly across the sky and then hover over the valley. I was staring at them suspiciously and notice that they start lowering themselves to the ground. I scream for every body to run inside, which they do. We notice the dogs are still outside so Bubber and I run out and round them up. I get the dogs in and Bubber starts collecting the chairs that were left outside. I start yelling at him for giving a shit about chairs. As I'm yelling at him the aliens come trotting up the hill from our pasture. They were built like life sized Barbie dolls, but without any arms. Their bodies were covered in short black hair, and they all had the heads of our shitty neighbor's one dog, Cujo. My stomach turned and I woke up.
As silly as those aliens sound, they were scary as shit.

09.07.2012 Car Crashing, Train Hopping

+old dream+
Attending an art school with Jes and Mitch. We have to carry ALL of our supplies plus our entire portfolios, and it really sucks because it is damn heavy. The three of us want to go get lunch somewhere so I offer to drive us to where ever. We are in my old Eclipse (worst car ever), and there is a terrible storm with a lot of rain. I'm trying to drive to some restaurant and my car keeps fish tailing and I eventually flip it four times. We get out and flip the car back over onto the wheels, get back in, and drive to the restaurant.
Suddenly I'm in Philadelphia with Joe and Cait. Cait is guiding us through and telling us which trains we should take to get home. I ended up getting on the wrong train and had to jump from it to the one I should I been on, which Joe, TJ, and Elise were riding.

11.20.2012 Gambit

+old dream+
This one is kind of vulgar. Also, entirely cartoon style, like old X-Men cartoon style.
In Xavier's school, because I'm apparently a mutant with some sweet crime fighting skills. I'm new there, so Gambit is showing me around the mansion. Then it turns into a kind of creepy sex/ rape scene, but I don't talk at all so it is extremely awkward and almost funny.
I certainly don't think of Gambit the same anymore.

12.19.2012 Morphing Animals

+old dream+
Sitting on a balcony with Jes watching dolphins doing Sea Worldesque tricks from the ocean onto the beach. The dolphins then morph into polar bears that are still doing dolphin tricks. The sand turns very white (like snow) and the polar bears grow big reindeer antlers.
Suddenly I'm just in a room playing with the ferrets.

01.02.2013 Volcano Beach

+old dream+ 

Lounging on a beach somewhere in Australia, or maybe New Zealand, with all the Berlins. I can't see the sun because the sky is filled with smoke from spewing volcanoes. There is lava spilling out into the ocean, pretty close by. It isn't really alarming and scary, just really beautiful. We get off the beach and get into a car to drive over a bridge that overlooks a huge chain of volcanoes erupting and leaking bright reds and yellows into the clear ocean. 

This dream was SUPER colorful.

Steve Martin

In a big mall with Steve Martin and a bunch of people dressed as Steve Martin (but Steve Martin at various stages in his career). Nothing really happened except we all rode the escalator.

Sesame Street parade balloons

There was a parade going on through the streets of Lancaster city, and all of the giant balloons where Sesame Street characters. There were "leaders" of the parade, who had lists of everybody's names at the parade, and their current location. Something went wrong with the Count VonCount balloon, and a little canister of Butane came flying out of his mouth. It was considered a "code red" situation and everybody had to report to their parade leaders. The Butane canister was about to crash land in a crowd of people but there was a limo with its truck wide open, which caught the rogue Butane and shut it in. The limo was dragging on the ground (apparently the Butane was really heavy?) and drove off into the distance. The area was considered safe at this point and the parade continued.

Powered apple filled donuts

I was at a much brighter Wegmans, picking out donuts. I ended up grabbing two powdered apple filled donuts, which I didn't even want. As I was paying for them some customer came up and grabbed one, thinking it was her coffee. I was all pissed off but ate both donuts anyway. Afterwards I found my old CAC team leader, Mindy (she has lost like 80 pounds since she left our department) and complained to her about my donut situation.

Call me crazy, but I think this dream has something to do with the fact that I gained some weight... hmm.

Hugh Mansion

I traveled through a jungle with lots of snakes (in the trees, falling on me), then ended up at a huge Aztec/Mayan-like mansion. Inside was beautiful and very cream colored with nice lighting all around. Ends up Hugh Jackman lives there. He and I just kind of decided to live in the same mansion I guess? I remember him going out and flying really old timey planes (he wore a leather bomber cap and goggles). At some point he was giving me a tour of his mansion, and he was really nice and charming, not douchey. We never had sex. Bummer.
But regardless, I lived in Hugh Jackman's mansion. In the middle of a snake ridden jungle. Fuck yeah.

Chinese cake

I was working at Wegmans and got really angry at this Chinese family while taking a cake order. I became overly frustrated and just stabbed the father with a knife, then proceeded to shove the entire family (of three) into the freezer. Soon I started to realize that bodies in the work freezer would be really noticeable, so I chopped them up into cake shapes and wrapped them in plastic wrap. I eventually start feeling guilt and it dawns on me that I'm going to jail. I fess up to Lana (my boss) and she starts to panic because a safety inspection in coming. As the inspectors are coming through, she says she is going to cover me (we are both frantic at this point). Joe wakes me up and I am EXTREMELY thankful it was all a dream.

Tapirs

Stuck in a building with horny tapirs. All of the females are very aggressive. Somehow I'm stuck in a public bathroom stall, and a female tapir with a tiny male on her back is kicking in the stall door. I'm standing on the toilet asking the people in the other stalls to make noise to distract her (I'm centimeters away from getting tapir foot in my gut). A lady next to me calls the tapir over and I finally have a chance to escape.... but my alarm goes off, so it is all over after that.

raisin factory

Joe and I slowly opening big industrial sized doors to a giant dehydrator...
"Finally! Our very own raisin factory!"